2010

I'm slow motion through some days, but for most days, I feel as though I'm watching the day in time elapse fast motion.

Like those movie scenes or music videos where the "main character" is experiencing this vortex of events swirling around them. We watch them slowly move through warp speed scenarios, and when these scenes catch up with this character, they stand there stunned, overwhelmed and dumbfounded.

This describes my 2009. This year has been the most jarring year of my life. I learned very much very quickly. Most of my story I have already told in a previous blog, and I will not repeat myself here.

Now is a time for reflecting on past situations, and learning from them. This year, I have experienced just about every emotion a human being can, and I'm grateful for every situation I found myself in over the past twelve months. A few of them were bad,and it kept me going. It brought out my inner beast somehow..I knew She was in there somewhere, and She's only getting stronger.

To all the back stabbers, to the overwhelming, to the venomous liars and the living human mess, THANK YOU. You have made me better.

As far as goals for 2010, I plan to get back on my Spiritual path. It seems that when I moved to Phoenix, I pulled over for a bit and lost what I was getting so close to. This year, I plan to visit the Temple of Sekhmet right outside of Vegas. It's THAT close, so I have no excuse. I wouldn't go if I felt like I HAD to..I'm going because I want to. Someone was kind enough to build a temple in Her honor, and I wish to visit. I have plans to do many things in honor of my Goddess, Sekhmet, and I shall actually carve out time in my day to do such things. She has done so much for me, and I will return favor.

Other goals include purchasing a gun, and getting my CCW. This is something I've wanted to do for awhile now and I can't put it off any longer. I'm a firm believer in the second amendment and by carrying a firearm, you are that amendment in action. If we don't use our rights, we will lose them, and we as a nation cannot let that happen.

Then the typical personal goals people set. Bettering yourself physically and what not. I'm doing good with my weight...and I push myself harder when I feel like I've over done the food..but, I picked up cigarettes again. Even though I'm back to my "one or two a day" routine, I know better. It will give way to three, then six, then twelve..and so on...so I need to find away to soothe that need. It's not so much the nicotine (although I'm sure it gets there), it's the hand to mouth movement I need.

I am seriously hoping to get some of my writing published this year as well. It's just sitting on my computer; I need to get something out there.

Also on my list:
Stay assertive.
Stay sarcastic and cynical (the resolution I have no trouble keeping).
Talk when I need to. Even if I'm in a situation where saying certain things won't matter at that moment, if it feels right, I'll say them anyway; I'll never know if it will help me down the road.

There's more...I guess it's all about general improvement...which is what 2010 will be about.

This time next week, we'll be three days in to the new year. May it already be turning around.

Have a Happy New Year everyone...see you one the other side.